My Friend Rush

A good friend of mine passed away recently, the doctors could not diagnose the problem and she suffered for a long time.

Cannot really come to terms with the fact that she is no more.
I got to know her on a a project, she did not want to get staffed on to the project, as she did not like the technology, and on that project i was playing the track lead role for the first time. I was floored by her dedication, inspite of not liking what she was doing, whatever she did was just perfect. Her dedication, commitment was amazing.

After that we got an opportunity to go to london on different projects, got to know her lot more. She will always tell me, aap ko thoda enthu hona chahiye...aap bas kaam karte ho, life mein masti marna chahiye.

She belonged to Sonipat, she was first girl in her family to have studied till M.Sc , first one to work in IT, who had gone abroad. I am sure in her city, she must have inspired lot of people.

She used to stay on her own in Delhi, she use to take proper care of food, use to get up early to make lunch for herself everyday. She was full of enthusiasm, loved to work hard and party hard, loved to explore places, roam around..i still remember that night in london, where 4 of us played staapu and lot of childhood games...and laughed imagining what would people feel if they saw the video monitors.

Later she came to b'lore and stayed with me. It was nice having her around. Though we were very different and were not close buddies but could always understand and connect.

Just feel god is unfair sometimes....what had she seen in life, she had so many dreams....may god give strength to her family to withstand the loss. i know its very easy for me to say this....

Rush, i have learnt a lot from you...thanks for teaching me what life is.

Bad Me

These days i am losing my temper at the drop of an hat and my temper rises like water gushing out of hose :)
Maybe its not these days, i always was like this...just that it has become more frequent now.

I know my batchmates can never imagine me like this, but guys i am really nasty, you will not like to work with me :).

I have a new team member on my team and i am trying to teach her what accountability is all about...somehow after a one nice cozy chat, i feel i have done it from my side and its time for her to act.

Today i made her work on a weekend, she asked me indirectly does she have to finish this today only or Monday will be okay. I said today only. I have seen her hesitate to ask me something, sadly she has no choice.

Sometimes feel i have become a sadist.

Will patch up once she meets my expectations once :)

Little Stream

As i trudge on this path of life
sometimes i break new barriers and discover new paths
at those moments, realize my potential and start thinking about the countless possibilities i have, ya ya i feel on top of the world
and i laugh at the people who thought i cannot do it
and also feel gratitude for all the people who encouraged me and were there for me
my friend puppy whom i call chotu or the big buffalo who comes to drink water and then gives me lot of Gyan

sometimes because of my lack of strength have to follow old paths laid by my elders
at such times realize my limitations and wish god had given me more strength

On this journey, have met lot of sweet people
remember the small boy who wanted me to take his paper boat safely to the big river
or the girl shanti who would dress me up with little wild flowers
or shambu the lover who would sit on the bank and sings beautiful songs
and of course my buddy chotu, who brings along with him his entire gang and then
we have a blast...i keep looking for such company as it makes me realize i am still kid in some ways...i guess everyone is

There are times i have met some nasty people, who try to bound me and want me to become stagnant, thank god each time i met someone like that, i was able to escape

I keep hearing horror stories from my cousins who are in big cities, they talk about the kind of stuff people drop in them, thank god i am in a village, where people still love nature to some extent. I will never go to city, that's for sure.

My mother river cannot understand what i am up to, i know she is worried as every time she calls me to find out about my future plans, i give vague answers...she tells me to think well about the path, as otherwise i will never meet the big river, i will just get dried up in the journey itself

I keep telling her, jaada mat socho...we are streams and stream should just flow in the direction the god gives a sign and not think of an end.

Taare Zameen Pe Review
Just got back after seeing Taare Zameen Pe, i am speechless..its been a while since i saw such a touching movie, which has been shot so beautifully...amazing storyline, excellent directions. I was always an aamir khan fan but now, this adoration has reached even higher height :) He really inspires me now...

The story is about a 8 year old who is dyslexic(has diffcultly in reading/writing), the hardships he faces because of the expectations of parents, society..and how a teacher helps him to realise what makes him unique and helps him come out of the depression...The main message is each kid is unique.
Its a must watch!

The movie made me realise....the role teachers can play. When i was in school, before 10th, i was just an average student, was never a rank holder, i don't think my parents thought i will do anything amazing(not that i have done it ;-))...in 10th met a maths teacher, who changed my life completely..she had more confidence in me than anyone i knew..she used to feel, i can be in IIT if i wanted...Its because of her, i ended up doing B.Sc(H) Maths, a subject i use to dread at one point of time. I always feel, studying under her was the turning point in my life...Owe to you Lakshmi ma'am for what i am today.

Also felt, all this competitiveness, marks, promotions etc are so meaningless in bigger scheme of things. I have seen people change based on where u r...when i was in 5th grade, i joined a school in delhi, based my marks, the so called elite/good students, decided that they will not talk me or play with me...later after few years, when my marks improved, saw the same people inviting me, talking to me.

Coming to think about it, i was normal, still had to struggle a bit(not much though). ... what will a mental challenged kid go through.

What we define as success is so shallow. Our education can make us get good jobs but do nothing with respect to making good citizens or human beings.